50 shades (or) bringing sexy back

So the boss (i.e. Michelle) has informed me that I need to get my shit together (i.e. post a MF-ing blog for the microscopic subset of the blogosphere that reads my posts).

For those interested in the hierarchy of the house, top of the ladder is CSD (who is surprised?).  Then Michelle.  Then me.  There may even be a few others on the ladder between Michelle and I.  The mailman for example.  Which would be fine with me if he brought us wine more often.

But back to the house … here is the thing.  You know how you have kind of a honeymoon phase with relationships?  Yeah – that happens with houses too.  For the first few months, we were all “ooh baby, I’ll get you anything you want.  I can’t wait to rub some paint on your sexy walls.  Ah yeah.”

Then you fall into a pattern.  You still have all that love for that house, but you feel like you can start wearing your underwear with holes around them and start leaving the bathroom door open.  The house won’t care!

So our honeymoon period of sexy paint time and duvet sewing time has waned a bit.  We have neglected the house a little … choosing to spend time in cabins in the woods and hiking in the Shenandoah and drinking wine at wineries and the like.

Don’t feel too sorry for the house.  It has had its revenge via broken fridges, dryers, ACs, and dryers again – in that order.  She is a salty bitch, house.

The anthropomorphism of our house is starting to annoy even me.  So let’s get to it, shall we?

We have gotten a few things done recently.

Like remember the pink room that was never really pink except for a bunch of tulips:

The pink room.  Or the pink dumpster.

The pink room. Or the pink dumpster.

No?  Yeah – neither do we:

They're GREEEEEEY-T!

They’re GREEEEEEY-T!

This is where the iPhone 5 fails.  Those colors are grey – one kind of slate/purple, one light misty grey.  And they are purt-y.  I have just fallen back in love with the house.

So has this one:

2013-07-04 13.58.44

We are pleased as punch.  And the spark is back!

Well, except for the next 2 weeks … as I will be in Indonesia for work.

UNLESS (!!!!!) you petition Michelle to write a post in my absence.

Here is how this is going to work:  She has agreed to add to this little experiment that we call “the blogosphere” if we get 10 comments on this post.  Bring it, bitches … comment your response to the following question:

I'll start: "a waning relationship with our HVAC and appliance repairman"

I’ll start:
“a waning relationship with our HVAC and appliance repairman”